The more work I do, the more I realize that acceptance is really our only choice if we want to live a life of well-being. The opposite of acceptance is resistance.
If you can, lie on your back and bring your knees up parallel to the ground so they create a shelf. Now take your hands, while keeping your elbows on the floor, and begin to push your hands into your thighs and your thighs back into your hands. You will likely feel your abs engage protecting your lower back. Feel the heat and energy that is created in your body, the pressure. This is resistance.
Now, breathe in and breathe out and release the resistance. Let your legs fall back towards the ground, let your hands relax. Feel the opposite of resistance.
Resistance is always an option, but not when we want to create a life of well-being and flow. Resistance keeps us engaged in the very situation from which we want freedom. You resist it because you do not like it and yet if you recall your physical exercise of resistance, the more your resist, the more the experience persists. It is only when we find acceptance that we actually begin to set ourselves free from the experience and create an opportunity to move forward.
Let’s redefine acceptance. We typically think of acceptance as agreeing with, liking, or inviting more of the very situation we are not wanting. Why would any rational person choose that? You need to reframe it to understand that acceptance is actually just acknowledging honestly what is happening in the moment. It is recognizing that the situation “is” and that’s just it. Once we accept what “is,” we can start to redefine, shift, shape, what “is” to be more to our liking. And if we can’t? We use acceptance to find peace because fighting it does not change it either- it only keeps us more engaged.