Turn Jealousy Into Power

Personally, I find jealousy to be one of the worst feelings ever. I’ve experienced it a fair share in my lifetime and was always left feeling depleted and un-empowered. I think the very nature of jealousy sets us up for just that- wanting something that someone else has and feeling like you can’t have it. Ouch! How can one feel better if that is the very premise of jealousy? So in my ever-growing attempt to feel “good,” I’ve learned how to befriend jealousy, recognizing that it is there to provide me with valuable information. So let me show you what I mean.

You PERCEIVE someone to have or be something that you want, but do not currently feel that you have or are.  Get clear on that. Your first step to releasing jealousy is to stop focusing on the other person and get clear that it is actually telling you something about you. No, not that you are a bad person, but rather that you are ready for more! So what is it? Step two is to label clearly what it is that you are actually wanting - happiness, the freedom to buy new clothes that you love, a relationship that is satisfying, to feel better about your body, etc. Step three is to OWN it. Acknowledge and embrace that you are wanting what you are wanting and ask yourself honestly, are you doing things that support you in moving closer to that desire? If not, what could you do? If yes, then take a deep breath knowing that in due time and with a little bit of gratitude you, too, will have what you want.

A great reminder - usually underlying all things that we are wanting is actually a “feeling” more than anything else. We believe that having that “thing” will make us “feel” X. So even if you can’t have the actual “thing”, you can always recognize and work towards creating the feeling that you are desiring.